International Rules of Wheel Horse Collecting

[WHX?? 49,973]

It was suggested we come down with some not so hard fast rules when it comes to aquiring these fine tractors. 

Feel free to add some as they hit you.... 

1  You can never have too many

2  Divorce court is not a legitmate reason for selling

3  Divorce court is a legitmate reason for buying. 

4 Parts tractors and non runners may not be considered part of the herd.

5 Runners with plug wires misplaced are considered non runners as far as SWMBO is concerned and may not be counted as part of the herd. 

6 100 dollar  max price for aquiring non runners may be waived if parts worth excceeds 101 clams.  

7 Bucket list tractors running or non running shall not have a max $$ limit.

8 If she don't know it about it  cannot be counted as part of the herd.

9 If you have an understanding wife and she gets your problem.... buy more .

10 Pawning wedding rings or family heirlooms to buy more tractors is acceptable. 

11 Keeping tractors hidden at other locations other than your residence is acceptable. 

12 Lawn art  shall not be considered part of the herd.

13 Dibs tractors shall be honored to all members in good standing provided they are not in divorce court. See rules 2 and 3. 

14 Repowers are acceptable as long as they run and drive.

15 Customs and restos are acceptable and encouraged as long as they meet the following. At least one nut, bolt, bracket or other original acoutrement is clearly visible. Said nut bolt or acoutrement may not be repainted. HEY... MN  boys made this one up! 

Edited November 5, 2020 by WHX24

[jeremi3210 739]

Another rule for the married collector is that its often easier to get forgiveness rather than permission! Oh and also never under any circumstances line the whole herd up in one line!!! 

[Tractorhead 9,066]

 

Country Borders are no acceptable restrictions to get you a Horse.

 

 

 

[ebinmaine 69,859]

Minimum Ball and Chain allowable LOW limit shall be 1 tractor per implement or 1 implement per tractor, whichever is more beneficial to the collector. 

 

Legal allowable upper limit shall be increased by acquiring implements whether duplicates or not. 

[midpack 938]

If looking for a part to upgrade an existing tractor, it is acceptable to purchase another complete tractor with the correct part, thereby allowing the "hunt" to continue for another correct part to upgrade the original tractor

[Shynon 7,474]

Lusting over another man's tractor is acceptable, even when you know it will never be yours

[AMC RULES 37,144]

Tractors listed under your wife's name are NOT part of your herd neither. 

[SylvanLakeWH 26,679]

The Ten Commandments have been hereby amended to accommodate reasonable Wheel Horse ownership:

 

1. Wheel Horses are the lord of all tractors, you shall not own any others.

 

2. You shall not own a tractor of any other name, unless in vain.

 

3. Keep holy all days so you get more Wheel Horse seat time.

 

4. Honor the Ponds

 

5. You shall not kill someone for their Wheel Horses, but you may mutually arrange for the herd to come your way in their will upon a long, wonderful life and a timely natural death.

 

6. Though shalt not view spending more time with your Wheel Horses than your wife as committing adultery 

 

7. You shall not steal a Wheel Horse, unless it is on Craigslist and you pay at least $1.

 

8. You shall not bear false witness against another member of the  community.

 

9. You absolutely shall covet your neighbor’s Wheel Horse.

 

10. Ditto

 

[953 nut 56,855]

Thou shalt not be limited by need or task to be accomplished by a potential  purchase, you can figure that out once it is in your barn.

[WHNJ701 4,165]

* the storage of a tractor and parts for a friend does not count to the herd

 

* At any given time yard art tractors can be rotated, restored, parts interchanged, these numbers will not count as long as the number of yard art tractor remain

 

* It is customary that any given night out with the family at restaurant the as the bill is being paid, in a voice loud enough for other tables to hear, " I had some extra money in the tractor fund"

 

* Inherited or given tractors from the wife's side count toward her numbers

 

* It is to be noted that going to any tractor show or swap meet with any empty truck, it is to assumed something will be in it upon return

 

*Tractors stored in the basement shall not be used as clothes rack, like the exercise bike parked next to it

 

[WHX?? 49,973]

Mid Pack nailed It! 

 

In the interest of avoiding injury due to swapping attachments it is acceptable and preferred to have a tractor for every implement. 

 

4 hours ago, Shynon said:

Lusting over another man's tractor is acceptable, Drooling on said tractor is also acceptable although no patina shall be harmed in the making of said drool.  

 

Edited November 5, 2020 by WHX24

[WHX?? 49,973]

7 hours ago, Tractorhead said:

 

Country Borders are no acceptable restrictions to get you a Horse.

Good point!

Interstate  travel for the purpose of herd building is acceptable and preferred in order to maximize the herd count in your state of residence. 

Edited November 5, 2020 by WHX24

[Pullstart 63,643]

If she says “whatever, get it if it’s what you want” she really means I’m not letting you touch me when you finally crawl into bed.  But she still said “get it”.

[ebinmaine 69,859]

8 minutes ago, WHX24 said:

 

In the interest of avoiding injury due to swapping attachments it is acceptable and preferred to have a tractor for every implement

 

3 hours ago, ebinmaine said:

Minimum Ball and Chain allowable LOW limit shall be 1 tractor per implement or 1 implement per tractor, whichever is more beneficial to the collector. 

 

Legal allowable upper limit shall be increased by acquiring implements whether duplicates or not. 

 

 

My thought process above was not only related to the reduction of injuries to collectors but also to the reduction of unnecessary caloric burning.

All parties involved must carefully avoid expending energy potentially swapping implements around that could be used on something far more important such as seat time or restoration processes. 

 

 

[kwalshy 234]

Tractors are to be dedicated to specific seasonal task(s) or activities; seasonal is defined per the astronomical calendar.

[ebinmaine 69,859]

4 minutes ago, pullstart said:

If she says “whatever, get it if it’s what you want” she really means I’m not letting you touch me when you finally crawl into bed.  But she still said “get it”.

 

 

I'd like to add to that by stating that any and all smart alec looks, motions, remarks etc by swmbo, ball and chain, significant other shall be deemed as full permission for inquired possible purchase transaction.  

 

[ebinmaine 69,859]

20 minutes ago, jabelman said:

Tractors stored in the basement shall not be used as clothes rack, like the exercise bike parked next to it

As a future potential negotiating leverage tool The collector shall be allowed one extra purchase for each infraction of an item being placed on above mentioned tractor that was not put there by The collector

[WHX?? 49,973]

Well written @kwalshy ...you are now our official secretary! 

[ebinmaine 69,859]

We're going to need some kind of a clause or paragraph in here about the interruption of family outings so as to look at tractors for sale on the side of the road

[WHNJ701 4,165]

10 minutes ago, ebinmaine said:

We're going to need some kind of a clause or paragraph in here about the interruption of family outings so as to look at tractors for sale on the side of the road

It shall be noted that any family member or members who don't point out and or complain about stopping and looking at valuable free treasures on the side of the road shall go directly to bed with no desert

[WHX?? 49,973]

12 minutes ago, ebinmaine said:

sale on the side of the road

It is mandatory a member lock them up when red tractors are spied for sale roadside. Forgiveness is automatically granted if said red tractor turns out to be a POS Murray.

It shall be a members duty to be observant of round hoods peeking out of weeds behind farmsteads. Thorough investigation is required of this and all barn finds. 

 

[Alex175 784]

I think we need one regarding implements not yet owned.

 

"I've got a number of projects in mind I could/am going to use that for" is an acceptable answer to "what are you going to use that for" or "do you really need that" or "how often is that going to be used" in regards to purchasing any implement/attachment you do not already own.

Edited November 5, 2020 by Alex175

[Mike'sHorseBarn 3,057]

5 minutes ago, Alex175 said:

I think we need one regarding implements not yet owned.

 

"I've got a number of projects in mind I could/am going to use that for" is an acceptable answer to "what are you going to use that for" or "do you really need that" or "how often is that going to be used" in regards to purchasing any implement/attachment you do not already own.

 

My wife's favorite line......what do you need another one for?  

[WHX?? 49,973]

5 minutes ago, Mike'sHorseBarn said:

what do you need another one for?

It is acceptable to hand the Missus a snow shovel, push reel mower or rake when asked why you need another tractor. 

 

It is acceptable and encouraged  for a member to acquire a hard hat when purchasing a new to tractor. 

Edited November 5, 2020 by WHX24

[ebinmaine 69,859]

4 minutes ago, Mike'sHorseBarn said:

 

My wife's favorite line......what do you need another one for?  

Okay so that raises another one...

 

The collector shall not be forced to explain his or her actions in purchasing, swapping tractors or implements to those who do not "speak tractor".