953 nut 55,194 #1 Posted July 3 Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a bar called the Rammer Jammer in a small farm town in Alabama. After last call the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity in which he tried his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his truck and trailer and fall into it. He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally, he got into the car and started the engine, switched the wipers on and off....it was a fine, dry summer night, flicked the blinkers on and off a couple of times, honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other patrons' vehicles left. Finally, when his was the only car left in the parking lot, he pulled out and drove slowly down the road. The police officer, having waited patiently all this time, now started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and administered a breathalyzer test. To his amazement, the breathalyzer indicated no evidence that the man had consumed any alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, 'I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyzer equipment must be broken.' 'I seriously doubt it', said the truly proud farmer. 'Tonight, I'm the designated decoy.' 8 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ri702bill 8,316 #2 Posted July 3 Here is a true story about a couple of local guys I know.... Steve & Glenn were the husbands of two of my wife's female friends.... all 6 of us did our fair share of hanging out together the last 45 years... One Saturday afternoon both Steve & Glenn were tying one on at a local watering hole called the Comealong Inn. Interesting place - it was in an old wood building; tavern on the north half, a laundromat on the south - AND straddling the town line of West Warwick & Coventry - the tavern was in West Warwick. Steve's car was parked on the street out in front of it.... It got to be past suppertime and they wanted to leave, but the Coventry Police had setup a Drunk Driving checkpoint in front of the laundry. They see it and do not want to risk getting a DUI. Glenn uses the payphone to call the Coventry Police saying that he is the bartender at another Coventry bar and that there is a big fight going on. Glenn finishes by saying that one of the patrons is brandishing a hand gun and hangs up. Glenn comes out from the back where the payphone was - Steve asks him "So???" Glenn tells him to wait for it... the 2 cops fold up their stuff and leave to go that other bar.... Glenn tells Steve to finish up his beer and says, OK let's go....!! No more antics there, the laundry burnt down years ago and taking the tavern with it.. 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites