sad times here

[upstate yank 219]

I just wanted to thank the ones that replied back on my thread as I really appreciate your thoughts and kindness though this heart break that I am going though; yes I  am going to have some rough times ahead so it seems that I will have to take each day as they roll by ;

what really hurt the most was that I was here when it happened and really there was nothing I could had done even though I tried ;if  she had told me that she was feeling ill or something wasn't right I might had the time to call 911 sooner and get her to the hospital and they could had saved her but really no one ever knows the out come ;

last but least I will say that the horses have been my hobby for years and the wife knew it matter of fact  there were times that she helped me tinker with them and I know that she would what me to stay with them and tinker with them at times when they need it ;

my dad used to call her little joe as she was part Indian and she would never were any shoes of any kind ;she always thought that was funny to be called that 

I know that she is pain free from the open heart surgery that was done 3 years back but having kidney failure at the 4th stage didn't help but it seems her doctors delayed so many of her appointments which I really don't understand why 

but any ways I want to thank every one for caring ; I will be around from time to time but as of now I need to get my head straighten out ;